Recap

This past week has been crazy! My Nanny & Fernando got married this past Saturday April 7th! It was a total blast!

Sunday Patrick & I spent Easter morning at church with my parents & then we headed across the lake for some crawfish with his side of the family! Sunday was also our one year anniversary in our home!!

 April 8, 2012

 April 8, 2011

Monday evening we went to the Zephyrs game with MawMaw!

I went on a job interview today. I'm hoping I get a call back! I really think it is something I would enjoy doing & it is time for a change!!
Time to do laundry!!
-Rach

it's been a while!

Okay so yes I admit, it's been a while. I don't really keep up with this blog like I intended to do in my first year of marriage! We have already been married 5 months!! I still can't get over how fast time is truly going. A lot of things are going on in our lives right now. My brother & sister in law are living with us for the time being, I'm back in school, my photography business is blossoming, Patrick is loving his job, and we will celebrate our one year anniversary in our home this Sunday!
It's been one year since Patrick & I were in an attorneys office with a bunch of crazy people fighting over things that were way over our heads! We honestly didn't think we were going to get the keys. We were both sitting there in a cold room, around a huge table, about to loose our breakfast! Well all was fine and we ended up with the keys to our first home!! I have honestly loved every second of owning our home. From the decorating, to re arranging furniture, to cleaning (yes, with time I know this will get old). Naturally, now that a year has come and gone we are ready for some renovations! Some big, some small. We bought an older home that needed some work for two reasons. 1. Because we wanted to make it our own. 2. Well, we couldn't afford a brand spankin' new house!
What's on the list? Well I'm glad you asked!
1. New tile in both of the bathrooms. Right now it is peel and stick. Yuck!
2. New siding/ stucco on the front of the house. We haven't decided which we are going with yet.
3. New interior doors. The doors we have now are ugly, brown, and you could punch a hole right through them, so they have got to go!
4. New counter tops in kitchen. We currently have purple laminate. Enough said.
5. New (matching) appliances. Everyone of our appliances are different & they don't match. So I would like to get stainless steel (matching) appliances :)
6. New vanities in the bathrooms.
7. Eventually we would like to replace the carpet & hardwood floors in the house with matching hardwood throughout.
8. New sofa & entertainment system.
9. Landscaping, Covered patio, and concrete an area for a patio in the backyard.
10. Wired lighting for the front garden. We bought these solar lights and since our front garden gets none barely any light, those were a WASTE of money!
11. This is kind of on the top of the list, but I will just put it down here. I would LOVE to turn one of the spare bedrooms into my office/at home studio. Right now I have my desk in the laundry room along with the dogs kennels, washer/dryer, hot water heater, countertops, and bookcase. Let's just say I'm a little cramped! I have this luxurious idea in my head of how I want the space to look and honestly I have been losing sleep over all the ideas I have.
This list will not get completed right away, after all, these things require lots of money! In between saving for ourselves, saving for a baby, saving for vacation, and saving for this list of rennovations, I know we will get it done (eventually).
Good things come to those who wait! Patience is a virtue! I need to keep reminding myself of these things. Patrick & my parents for that matter always tell me I'm 10 steps ahead of everyone else with my thinking. Which is true and I'm trying to work on living in the moment and taking one day at a time. But I will admit, it is something that is very difficult for me to do.
Nate just arrived to spend the day with me, duty calls!
I will write soon,
-Rach

Moving On

Is there a time limit on grief?
Is there a time when you decide it's time to move on?
Is there a time when you come to realize that person will never be back?
Is there a time when you look around over the past few days and wonder why you haven't gotten out of bed?
Whose to say that any of the questions have to be answered?
The answers to these questions all depend on the person and the situation.
Everyone deals with grief in their own way. It is not something that people should stereotype and put a label on.
If you think that there should be..Well, excuse me, but who the hell are you to have that kind of authority?
It can take days, weeks, months, years.
My dad said the other day you never know how someone else shoes feels till you wear them and walk in them for yourself. This is so true! Don't tell people you know what they are going through, if you really don't. Because honestly that person probably wants to smack you. Don't offer to help if you don't feel like following through.
I truly have been heartbroken over the past week. I am grieving for many reasons..because I have lost a cousin and a grandpa, because I honestly don't know how my aunt and cousin are still functioning members of society after what they have grown through, because I know there are things my dad wishes he could have done with my grandpa, because I don't have any grandpa living, because my family grieves, because my family and I will never hear that persons voice or feel their touch again.
But I am grateful for many reasons..because I have a family in heaven that will be waiting for me with open arms one day, because I know deep in my heart my aunt and cousin will find peace, because I know there are things my dad is grateful for that he did with my grandpa, because I have 2 guardian angel grandpas, because my family is grateful for these same things, because I am grateful for the sayings I remember from them and because of the hugs I was given.
Grieving is a process that is long and grueling. You never really finish grieving. There will always be that thing that reminds you of someone or that smell that reminds you of them. I never knew my mom's mom, she passed away when my mom was 25, its been 25 years now and my mom still puts on a waterworks show when something reminds her of my grandma. And that's okay, it only shows that their memory and legacy lives on :) There will always be a place in your heart that longs for that person.  But there will come a time when you hear that persons name, you will smile, instead of cry.
 John 16:22 - "Now is your time of grief, but I will see you again and you will rejoice, and no one will take away your joy."
Rejoice. Rejoice. Rejoice.

death

Death according to the internet is the permanent termination of the biological functions that sustain a living organism. What a blunt way to put it. No feeling in that definition. Death is the 5 letter word that no one wants to hear. It is inevitable. It is tragic. It sucks. Death is a crazy balance of peace and rage. When one's life comes to an end a million thoughts go racing through your mind. The 4 W's & H are perfectly exemplified in death. What? Why? Where? When? and How?  The 5 stages of grief occur immediately.Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, Acceptance.
Death is something that we have been familiar with since we were born. One person dies every 12.1 seconds. But one person is born every 7.4 seconds. With death comes new life. Not necessarily a new physical being but the stories of death give people a new meaning to life. It gives people the will to keep fighting. Death gives other people second chances.
Death has a crazy way of bringing people closer together.
My family has experienced 2 deaths in 2 days. We have 2 funerals to attend. We will mourn the loss of 2. We have 2 more angels in heaven. We have 2 more reasons to continue to live life to the fullest and 2 more reasons to continue to live out their legacy. My grandpa has left behind 11 children. 28 grandchildren.(Sean makes 29, but I'm sure he is holding hands with grandpa in heaven as we speak) 19 great grandchildren(2 on the way) and many friends that he has met along the way.
Our family will be together for the first time in years. Death has a funny way of doing that, of bringing people together. Death has a funny way of making people realize that the silly things we worry about like laundry, dishes, homework, if the grass is cut, if our hair looks okay, and on are merely silly.
So death is not just the permanent termination of the biological functions that sustain a living organism. It is someones, grandma, grandpa, wife, husband, son, daughter, niece, nephew, aunt, uncle, granddaughter, grandson, friend, or coworker. Every person has a story to tell and a life to live and if that person's life is cut short by the 5 letter word we all dread to hear, then it is the people that they left behind responsibility to continue to live out their legacy. It is our responsibility to make sure that person is never forgotten. They will always be with us everyday, it is our responsibility to notice the signs, to listen with open ears, to feel the wind or rain on our face, to bask in the sunshine, to embrace new life for they are now our guardian angels steering us in the direction we need to go.
So let us not be saddened by death, but rejoice their life, rejoice the things they have done, rejoice in the memories that we do have.